As soon as I got a smiley Fijian welcome from a group of big strong men wearing skirts and flowers behind their ears I knew I was on to a good thing. Massive smiles, guitar playing and a really chilled out attitude to life. Everything runs on ‘Fiji time’.

I’m sat hiding in my 10 bed dorm only metres away from a fate worse than death for me, a night of forced fun. I like to have fun. Over the years I’ve had like so much fun, I promise. But when you’re all sat having a bite to eat, super relaxed and enjoying …